certifiable.

let me begin by saying that it's a pet peeve when people compare their pets to children. i love my dog, but i fully recognize that she is just that--a dog. a member of the family? yes. loved? wholeheartedly. but, nevertheless, a pooch.

and now i'm going to completely contradict myself.

you know the kind of parents who just aren't willing to admit that their kids aren't perfect? i am not one of those pet parents. in fact, if i were to give gerty the dog equivalent of an IQ test, i'm quite positive she'd be cognitively impaired.

proof:

kenny the inbred white tiger.

gertrude the great dane.

the resemblance is uncanny.

on a completely unrelated note, i have the utmost respect for national geographic photographers. or even william wegman--the (creepy?) weimaraner photographer.

c'mon, that's just weird.

my new found respect for these photographers developed (pun intended) after i tried to get just one good shot of gerty this morning.

in an effort to capture the beast in her natural habitat, i tiptoed outside.

the beast spots me.

the beast quickly springs into action.

and this is when it gets scary.

this is the moment right before she hurdles my head. no joke.

after double checking to make sure i didn't lose an eye, or something, i tried once more to capture "the shot."

clearly my endeavor was not a success.

look at the magical moment the camera captured: the moment gerty ran through her own crap. you can actually see the dog crap as it gets torn up by her foot. the camera did not catch me using some colorful language as i scraped the poop off of her foot. now that was a truly magical moment.

gisele bundchen she is not. cognitively impaired? she probably is.

but i'll keep her.