doggy damage.

i've said it before and i'll say it again: freakin' gertrude.

do you remember my $20 thrift store chair? the one with the clean lines and good bone structure?

let's just say those clean lines are looking a little rough around the edges lately.

there are three legs in this photo. two of said legs have been chewed. the third belongs to the chewer.

the damage is not beyond repair. it's easy enough to saw off the old legs and attach new ones. but that's not the point. the point is that i'm about ready to have my dog's teeth removed. and while i'm at it, maybe her nails. shoot, might as well lop off her tail, too. she is one giant fur ball of destruction. some of her other victims include:

my dining room table leg. gerty loves wood. kind of like mr. woodchuck from full house.
do you see that flower embellishment in the lower left corner of this dwellstudios pillow? apparently gerty thought the pillow would look better sans flower. so she ate it.

are you wondering where that other green candle went? it has probably been digested and is living in my backyard now along with three of it's closest friends.

probably the most expensive chew toy: my glasses. i loved these glasses. apparently gerty hated them.

this photo shows the remnants of my planner. it was a three year planner that already had two years' worth of events in it. the fact that i didn't get to use the third year annoys me like a sneeze that just won't come out.

i believe this has been discussed. cya, dog bed.

this is a picture of my brother holding her tail while she sleeps. that bandage on the tip of her tail is there because she wags her tail so hard and smacks it on the corners of walls, cuts it open, and smears blood all over the walls. awesome.

i don't have photographic evidence of the following items, but trust me, she's damaged and/or destroyed them:

• my couch slipcover (a nice big rip right down the middle)
• the white paint job on the trim around my windows and baseboards (scratches)
• my car interior (suffering from perma-dog smell)
• my backyard (dead grass patches as far as the eye can see thanks to lots-o-pee)

freakin' gertrude.